DUNGHOLES AND DUNDERHEADS
Assorted Fantasy-Based Cliches for Risus: The Anything
RPG © 1993-2001 by S. John Ross
Dungholes and Dunderheads (First Edition!) © 2002 Guy
Gregory Hoyle
Does Risus really need more clichés
for fantasy campaigns? After all, in addition to the ones in the Risus game
itself, Jason Puckett’s got some,
Brandon Blackmoor’s got some, Mark
Whitley’s got some, Hollis McCray’s got some, Carl Hewitt‘s got some… you get the picture.
But that didn’t stop me. What actually stopped me, after a week or so, was
the fact that the campaign I was creating these clichés for has mutated into
a completely different type of campaign. Ranther than consign them to electronic
oblivion, I decided to inflict these upon the Risus community and the World-Wide
Web. So they’re a tad… unfinished.
I don’t claim that any of them are completely original, but anything that
inspired me, I tried to scrape off the serial numbers and put my own little
twist on. But all the guys I mentioned above spurred me on, even if they didn’t
know it. Thanks, guys!
Permission granted to use these as you will, but if you put ‘em up on your
website or use ‘em in a game, be a pal and gimme a holler.
If you publish them as your own and make a million dollars off of it, I’ll
be sending the Mind Flayers and Brain Moles after you.
Suggestions and comments are also welcome.
Guy Hoyle (mailto:ghoyle1@airmail.net)
FIGHTER CLICHÉS
These guys all know how to kick ass and take names.
- Fighter
Slay monsters, hew limbs, bash heads, clean gore off your weapons and armor
Variations: Reluctant Warrior, Grim Humorless Veteran, Merry Swordsman,
Grizzled Old Campaigner, Gullible Castle Guard, Doomed Champion, Philosophical
Sargeant, Natural Leader, Sneaky Strategist
- Ranger
Tramp stealthily through the wild, fight monsters, know nature lore, do
trick arrow stunts, wear camouflage
Variations: Guardian of the Forest, Beastmaster, Royal Falconer, Xenophobic
Mountain Man, Wild Man
- Barbarian
Glower menacingly at soft city dwellers, complain about the filthy streets,
praise the virtues of living in a crude lean-to in your faraway homeland,
forget to shower except when it rains ,heft a mean battleaxe, perform amazing
feats of martial prowess, have a wyrd or geas, leave a trail
of destruction at a moment’s notice, drink kegs of ale, punch out rude oxen
- Gladiator
Salute the emperor because you’re about to die, fight with odd weapons and
too little armor, please the crowd, flex muscles impressively, “it’s just
a scratch”, kill opponents entertainingly, learn clever ways to “die” convincingly
Variations: Enslaved Pit-Fighter, Famous Professional Gladiator, Overconfident
Pit-Warrior
- Outlaw
Spit in the face of authority, scoff at the law, rob wayfarers and passersby,
live in unpleasant places, disguise yourself as harmless local, travel lightly,
watch your back, brag about the bounty on your head
Note: just about anybody can be an outlaw, so this is a great cliche
to combine or pair with others.
Variations: Freedom-Loving Rebel, Fugitive from Justice, Reluctant Gangster,
- Pugilist
Fight without weapons or armor, float like butterfly/sting like bee, get
in lots of duels, register fists as deadly weapons
Variation: Befuddled Bare-KnuckledBoxer, Romantic Kick-Boxer,
Ascetic Martial Arts Monk,
- Pirate
Sail the seas, attack ships, ransom wealthy prisoners, climb the rigging,
say things like “Sink me fer a lubber!” and “Shiver me timbers!”, have an
eyepatch or a peg leg or a hook
Variations: Dashing Privateer, Grizzled Sea Dog, One-Eyed Buccaneer,
Rum-Swilling Freebooter
- Sharpshooter
Hit a fly’s eye at 100 yards, be rock-steady, be extremely protective of
your equipment
Variations: Eagle-eyed Archer, Carck Spellcaster, Trick Knife Thrower
Weapon Master
Single-minded devotion to mastering one type of weapon, not being able to
master other types of weapons, being able to do cool things with the type
of weapon that you can master
Variations: World-weary Swordslinger, Eager Young Duellist, Lord of the
Lash
- Soldier of Fortune
Getting paid for fighting, getting tricked out of being paid by evil lord
who hired you, looking to be hired by a non-evil lord, gambling and drinking
and wenching your pay away
Variations: Avaricious Mercenary, Idealistic Sellsword, Heartbroken Footslogger
- Soldier
Perform duty, esprit de corps, take orders from your superiors, give orders
to your subordinates, know the regulations, complain about the food, stand
watch, complain about “the brass”, maintain discipline on the battlefield,
gamble and drink and wench off duty
Variations: Grizzled Veteran, Green Young Recruit, Dashing Young Officer,
Bumbling Old Campaigner, Pious Conquistador, Young Woman Disguised as a
Soldier
- Thug
Know every filthy street and alley on your turf, prey on the helpless, be
loud and obnoxious, use violence as a negotiation tactic
Variations: cocky bravo. belligerent mook, hired lackey, brutish lout,
amoral henchman, enormous bouncer
- Paladin
Smiting evil, ride big horse, being holy, being chivalrous, rebuffing undead
creatures
Variations: Defender of the Faith, Pious Templar, Compassionate Hospitaller,
Disillusioned Knight Errant, Militant Priest, High-Handed Cavalier, Gallant
Chevalier, Devout Crusader
- Swashbuckler
Be witty, fight with panache, swing from chandeliers, vault over railings,
dive through windows, hide from outraged spouses, know the derring-dos from
the derring-don’ts, revel raucously, hobnob with the hoi polloi, defend
the honor of yourself/your comrades/anyone you find attractive
- Samurai
Follow code of bushido*, use
neat weapons, know some artsy skills, shout “kiai!” and fight impressively
*Obey your lord absolutely, be ready to die for your honor or your lord,
avenge dishonor to your honor/lord/family, repay all debts honorably, don’t
display cowardice at any time
Variation: Dishonored Samurai, Honorable Ronin
- Cattle Raider
Sneak past patrols, quiet cattle, liberate herd, know lots of rope tricks
ROGUISH CLICHES
- Thief
Steal valuables, purloin treasure, filch a fortune, pilfer swag, cut purses,
burgle shops, loot coffers, ransack vaults, slink warily, shadow victims,
strike from behind, fence booty, bypass booby traps, scale obstacles
Variations: Deft Cutpurse, Dashing Highwayman, Gentleman Jewel-Thief
- Assassin
Kill people for money, sneak around secret passages, wear cheesy disguises,
use interesting poisons, obey the Assassin’s Code*
*1) Get the gold up front; 2) No freebies; 3) It doesn’t matter how they
die, as long as you’re paid for it; 4) He who stalks and runs away, lives
to slay another day.
Variation: Sly Ninja, Murderous Cutthroat, Surreptitious Strangler
- Beggar
Grovel convincingly, show crippling
injury, flatter gullible passersby, spin tale of woe, collect juicy gossip,
rummage through garbage heaps, eat stuff that would gag an orc, sleep in
alleys and on doorsteps
Variations: Vagabont, Tramp, Mendicant, Panhandler, Freeloader
- Spy
Sneak around, decode secret messages, eavesdrop, stay out of the way, disguise,
know foreign languages, get back with information
Variations: sleuth, informer
- Amorous Scoundrel
Go without sleep, run from enraged spouse, leap out window, caress passionately,
endear with a look, virility under duress, be attractive and charming
Scout
Live in the wild, hunt game, trap small animals, know the lay of the land,
watch enemy troop movements, size up danger, be self-reliant, be uncomfortable
out of your element
Variations: Pathfinder, Frontiersman
- Smuggler
Fence illicit goods, feign innocence, have connections, appraise goods,
obtain forged documents, conceal identity, have an escape plan
- Spy
Cross enemy lines, infiltrate enemy territory, collect vital information,
attend swanky parties, sit in smoky taverns, collect latest rumors and gossip,
use cover identities, plan escape route
-
MAGIC CLICHÉS
Almost all magicians, unless otherwise
noted, need to use material equipment, components, gestures, and incantations
to cast spells; doing without these requirements raises the TN of the spell
or makes a misfire more likely. Magicians traditionally shun weapons other
than a dagger and staff, and usually wear no armor, since they tend to hinder
a magician’s spellcasting ability. However, magician/warriors are not
unknown.
Magic-Users are generalists, not focusing on any one magical specialty; they
have the widest range of magic at the cost of power and finesse. Magical
specialists, such as the Abjurer or the Conjuror, are capable of very refined
and subtle spells, but only in their own professions. Village crones,
mediums, and hedge wizards are looked down upon by all wizards as untrained
meddlers, dabbling in arts best left to the professionals.
- Magic-User
Tramp through dungeons and hostile wildernesses, be a magical jack-of-all-trades,
cast spells with polysyllabic names and strange ingredients, have trouble
casting esoteric and specialized spells
- Alchemist
Brew useful but noxious potions, analyze somebody els’s noxious potions,
write recipes in a complex code, seek the philosopher's stone, find out
how to turn lead into gold, blow up lab on a regular basis
- Village Crone
Cackle menacingly, prepare corpse, tell how much better things used to be,
hide valuables away, know secret
- Necromancer
Summon spirits of the dead, reanimate corpse, command the undead, look good
in black, be spooky, hang around in graveyards and ancient battlefields,
exorcise ghosts, make flesh rot, make things die
- Hedge Wizard
Find lost possessions, craft protective amulets, scare away vermin and unwelcome
visitors, create sleeping potion, cure minor ills, use natural properties
of plants and animals
- Sorcerer
Make trouble, afflict with boils, ,poison wells, afflict cattle, cause
plague, pretend not to be a sorcer or
- Medium
Hold seance, enter trance, contact spirit guide, contact the dead, speak
in spooky voices, interpret knocks on the walls by spirits of the dear departed,
speak in spooky voices
- Abjurer
Cast spells which ward, discourage,
dispel, eliminate, and hinder people, places, and things. Prevent and remove
curses, protect against injury or misfortune, exorcise possessing demons,
banish extraplanar creatures.
- Transmuter
Turn things into other things, make
things bigger/ smaller /heavier/ lighter/ etc., unlock doors (and vice versa),
change sex, change stone into mud, change lead into gold
- Conjuror
Bring forth living and non-living things,
dispel conjured things, make circle of protection against the creatures
you’ve conjured, know secret names of creatures, contact entities from other
realms of existence.
- Spellbinder
Change opinions, control minds, alter
emotions, hypnotize, endow items or creatures with magical powers,
- Enchanter
Make magical things, spend lots of
time in the shop, know an appropriate crafting skill, stay at home a lot,
get sought out by people on quests
- Diviner
Cast horoscope, examine livers, read
palms, interpret omens, gaze into crystal ball, examine head-bumps, read
cards, read tea leaves, dowse for water, use ouija board, look in magic
scrying pool, read runes, bibliomancy, interpret dreams, cast lots, psychometry
- Illusionist
Create noises, make people think there’s
a monster attacking them, make things look like they’re other things, make
people think they’ve been attacked by something real, keep people from
seeing things that are actually there
- Invoker
Call upon supernatural entities for
aid, shape magical forces, cast lightning bolts and fireballs, snare enemies
in sticky webs, create walls of fog and mist, summon cloud of poisonous
gas,
- Warlock
Know how to use weapons and magic together,
carry troops over walls, spy on enemy plans, undermine enemy defenses, detect
enemy ambushes, hinder enemy’s attacks
(Yeah, I know I’m using “warlock” in the wrong sense, but I like it this
way)
- Demonologist
Summon demons, compel or negotiate with demons, get rid of demons, smell
faintly of brimstone
PRIESTLY CLICHÉS
- Cleric
Use no edged weapons, advance the interests of your god, turn undead,
read omens, beseech the gods to intercede, deliver sermons, mouth platitudes
- Village Priest
Bless crops and cattle, perform marriages, bless newborns, perform funerals,
serve the gods
- Druid
Sacrifice prisoners (only when absolutely necessary), predict weather, answer
questions with riddles, invoke the powers of nature, perform bizarre rituals
Variations: Rebel Druid, Village Druid, Wandering Druid
- Bloodthirsty Crone
Appease the Earth, assure fertility, inflict curse on the wicked, lift curse
from community, conduct human sacrifice (only when necessary), stop plague
- Mystic
Seek enlightenment, meditate upon obscure philosophical dilemmas, avoid
unnecessary confrontations (but not the necessary ones), use obscure quotations
from dead philosophers and strange folk wisdom, feign death, leave body,
levitate self, don’t own more than you can carry
Note: Combine this with the Pugilist to get a martial arts Monk
- Houngan
Make voodoo dolls, dance ecstatically,
be possessed by loa
MISCELLANEOUS CLICHES
I
couldn’t decide which category to put most of these in, so I lumped them all
together.
- Acrobat
Juggle, walk tightrope, amuse audiences, wear funny clothes, be nimble,
be sure-footed
- Amazon
Stand up for yourself to any patronizing male, show women how to fend for
themselves, show those bully-boys who’s better
- Animal Master
Talk to animals as if they understand you, listen to animals as if you can
understand them, have a li’l animal buddy, spend a lot of time living with
the animals, learn wisdom of the animals
- Diplomat
Carry important messages, be an emissary, pal around with foreign courtiers,
indulge in intrigue, keep your eyes and ears open, know what to kiss and
when, know about what’s in vogue
Variations: envoy, ambassador
- Explorer
Get antsy when you’re home too long, go somewhere nobody else has ever heard
of, meet people you can’t talk to, stumble on lost civilizations, collect
exotic memorabilia, tell stories about how you got that scar, learn scandalous
phrases in foreign languages
- Jester
Wear bright colors and bells, talk in a high funny voice, make witty observations
about people at the court who hopefully won’t get mad and have you killed,
embarrass that guy you don’t like, make everybody realize just how witty
you really are, take a pratfall, juggle as if your life depended on it,
caper and prance
Variations: Sinister clown, insane trickster
- Mariner
Live on a ship, never get seasick, say things like “arr, matey” and “landlubber”,
wear little or no armor, batten down the hatches, swab the deck, climb the
rigging, man the fo’c’sl, get tattoos, wear a ring in your ear, have a girl
in every port, use cutlasses and belaying pins, dance a hornpipe
- Merchant
Buy cheap and sell dear, haggle haggle haggle!, know what things cost, keep
an eye on your stuff, organize caravan, carry heavy stuff, pick up the local
gossip
- Aristocrat
Live lavishly, be superior, command respect, have a lot of influence, keep
the peasants in their place, demand the best things in life, go hunting
and riding, wear fancy clothing
- Peasant Done Good
Wax nostalgic about your grubby little home, long for the days you were
slopping the hogs and milking the cows, “back there people take care of
each other”, spout folksy wisdom, be a hometown hero
- Rider
Be inseparable from mount, know each other’s location and general health,
know what each other want, fight while mounted, have special mount.
- Primitive
Be primitive, hunt and forage, wear skins and paint, know about animals
and plants and spirits, sleep lightly, be perplexed by foreign ways
- Savage
Live in dangerous or unusual environment,
be exotic and unusual, remark frequently on how they do things back in your
tribe, be completely comfortable in climates like the one you used to live
in (swamps, snow, desert, jungle, whatever)
- Scholar
Know lots of obscure lore, write down everything, be an expert on something,
act as if you know something about everything else, criticize rivals, write
flattering letters to patrons
- Smith
Make things out of metal, ignore burns, impressive muscles, evaluate metalwork,
snarl at lazy apprentice
Variations: blacksmith, weaponsmith
- Farmer
Grow food, raise livestock, kill varmints, gripe about taxes, talk about
weather
- Fisherman
Fish, build boat, repair nets, make traps, know the local waters, brag about
the one that got away
- Herder
Care for herd, train dog, butcher herd animals, run long distance, listen
to endless stream of off-color jokes about herders and their beasts
- Brewer
Brew ale or mead, keep bees, work with a hangover
- Woodcrafter
Find decent wood, make items out of wood
- Craftsperson
Craft, make minor Equipment, Find Necessary Supplies, Haggle; Inspired,
Patient
Variations: Silversmith, jeweller, mason, potter, weaver, cook, baker,
leatherworker, laundress
- Ruler
Look imposing, bluster, debate, compromise, rally followers, keep followers
happy, find weakness in argument, negotiate
Variations: Tribal Chieftain, Barbarian King, Crafty Usurper, Beloved
Queen, Despised Tyrant, Reluctant Dictator, Puppet Monarch
- Advisor
Advise ruler, cite precedent, talk for hours, speak with authority, debate
minutiae, know hiatory and laws
Variations: Scheming Kingmaker, Dedicated Public Servant, Self-Serving
Bureaucrat
- Healer
Bind wounds, split broken bones, know herbal lore, treat illness
Variations: Discrete Royal Physician, Crusty Old Sawbones, Rustic Herbalist,
Embittered Combat Medic, Devout Faith Haler
- Midwife
Know signs of pregnancy, tend mother-to-be, spread old wive's tales, terminate
pregnancy
- Shipwright
Build Ship, Patch Leaks, Make Sails, Boil Pitch, Career Ship
- Berserker
Ignore Wounds, Look Really Scary, Fight To The Death, Intimidate, Immune
to Fire
- Innkeeper
Keep a tidy inn, throw out ruffians, provide food and drink, keep valuables
safe
Variations: Nosy Landlord, Generous Taverner, King's Hosteler, Long-Suffering
Bartender, Buxom Serving Wench, Burly Barmaid
- Entertainer
Juggle things, sing funny songs, tell lame jokes, do funny voices, imitate
local celebrities
Variations: Wacky Juggler, Lame Comedian, Sonorous Soliloquist, Nimble
Prestidigitator, Exotic Dancer
- Natural Philosopher
Be curious, know lots of obscure facts, carry around bundles of esoteric
equipment, collect thousands ofspecimens, know when eclipses are going to
happen
- Demigod
Be the child of a god, have gods meddling
in your life, be unusually strong/good looking/tough to kill/nimble fingered/fleet
footed/able to fly/etc (your choice, check with Referee), win lots of glory,
die an unusual or horrible death (have your flesh eaten away by corrosive
poison unknowingly administered on a robe by your wife, get torn apart by
maenads, get hit by a lightning bolt, etc.)
- Pacifist
Resist passively, don’t
fight (even to defend yourself or others), tell others not to fight, resolve
conflicts peaceably, don’t wear armor, get beaten up a lot, get killed (usually
only once)
- Shapeshifter
Change your shape, basically
Variations: werewolf, wereboar, werebear, wererat, wereplatypus
CREATURE CLICHÉS
Some of these would make good player characters; some would not. That’s
between you and the Referee.
- Wood Elves
Live forever, wear earth tones, caper and frolic, shoot intruders,
protect the forest, arrange flowers, sneak around the woods, harrass dwarves,
hate orcs, be vulnerable to iron
- High Elves
Look ethereal, be wise, brew delicate herbal teas, lament for the days of
yore, be understood even if the other guy doesn’t understand Elvish, weave
armor out of silk, be vulnerable to iron
- Dark Elves
Be evil, like sorcery, like spiders,
hate daylight, dress in dark colors, be vulnerable to iron
- Half-Elves
Less frolicsome than elves, more pointy-eared than humans, never really
get along with either one, don’t be vulnerable to iron
- Half-Orcs
Be smarter than most orcs, be more apt to bite off a hunk of somebody than
a human
- Lizard Man
Dwell in swamp, dream of the days when your ancestors ate humans for lunch
- Half-Giant
Have trouble finding a bed that's long enough, bang your head on doorjambs,
crash through dilapidated floors, smash doors, crush puny humans
- Orc
Be strong, be brutish, be ugly, sharpen your fangs at dinner, eat anything
remotely edible, break things, fight on any pretext, win by cheating, bully
those weaker than you
Variations: big strong orc, snivelling little orc
- Gnoll
Be lazy, be vicious, be ill-tempered, be self-centered, be greedy, lay ambushes,
track prey by scent, have a fondness for carrion
- Halfling
Walk upright under tables, look eagerly forward to your fifth meal of the
day, avoid 'bigguns', seem innocent, pilfer casually,
- Hill Dwarf
Carry large axes, abhor orcs, make fun of elves, wear lederhosen, build
quality cuckoo clocks, drink foaming tankards of ale, yodel
- Mountain Dwarf
Be short and stocky, fight fiercely when provoked, live in palatial caverns,
never get lost underground, have a fondness for mining and intricate devices,
dislike orcs, detest elves
- Merman
live underwater, make pets of fish, fall in love with land-dwellers, never
use fire, know where all the cool wrecked ships are
- Goblin
Live in or near human households, be small, be ugly, be mischievous, become
invisible, play malicious pranks, pinch naughty children, be obsessively
neat
- Kobold
Be small, hang around in mines, make
knocking noises, lead miners astray, move tools when they’re not looking,
fill in diggings overnight
- Fairy
Be tiny and winged, change people into
other things, cast mischievous spells, become invisible, frolic in wooden
glades and meadows, drink nectar from little flowery cups, love dance and
music
- Swan Maiden
Change into swan when wearing the Swan Coat, take Swan Coat off and leave
it unguarded when you bathe, marry the man who steals the Swan Coat, leave
him and take (or murder) your children when you get the Swan Coat back
- Nymph
Be beautiful, live in river or forest
or mountain or ocean, be friends with all the animals that live with you,
seduce young handsome mortals, never get old or ugly
Variations: Water Nymph, Wood Nymph, Oread, Oceanid, Dryad
- Crawling Claws
Be a disembodied hand, crawl around, stick your fingers in their eyes and
noses and ears
- Manscorpion
Sting people, claw people, discuss hiw people want to be stung and clawed
Variation: Womanscorpion
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